Signs You’re Dating an Emotionally Unavailable Guy | Dating Advice for Women by Mat Boggs
Mat Boggs shares dating advice for women and Signs You're Dating an Emotionally Unavailable Guy
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Mat Boggs Bio:
Mat has helped millions of people around the world attract love and develop fulfilling relationships. He’s also the founder of a revolutionary system of attracting love called Manifest Your Man.
In addition to running a highly successful coaching business, Mat is also the co-author of the best-selling Project Everlasting, which received a major, six-figure advance from Simon and Schuster publications.
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These are great signs to look for. I was with a narcissist who started out with everything good for a month or two. Then it was irritability and picking fights and realizing there was no way this guy is mature enough or stable enough to have a relationship period. He was not emotionally available and never would be.
Your schooling is amazing ❤
Thanks Mat.
Thank you for saying “do not try to fix them.” I made the mistake of thinking i could love a man enough to fix his problems. And in the end, they are the cold, hard rock that you crash up against. You end up damaged yourself. When a man is behaving this way, he has to want to fix it himself. Why would he fix anything when he’s already being showered with love? Men who are like this usually operate from a very simple state. “Am i getting everything i want from this woman?” The fact that you’re not getting your needs met isn’t a factor for them. At all. Do not try to fix them or love them enough. My ex soaked it all up and then cheated while telling me he was on work trips. He wanted his cake and to eat it, too. Because i was that good to him. Why should he leave, when he can lie and have everything? Don’t make that mistake. By learning from coaches like Mat, i’m with a great guy. He doesn’t hesitate be there for me.
This. This was my life lesson too. Painful but needed. Never will do so again 😅
Omg I was literally thinking this!!!
My mom passed and he wouldn’t even sympathize with me when he called, he’d avoid the topic when he could clearly see that am sobbing every time he calls 😢
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I found my cat dead when coming home. He once lived with him. Nothing. Wouldn’t even come to say goodbye or support me. I had to call a vet in the middle of the night, to perfom emergency euthanasia on my cat. Nothing. 3 months later I had my eldest cat, scheduled for euthanasia the day after. He knew. Nothing. A few days after he finally send a text.. 😅 and then acted surprised and defensive when I was angry at him 🙄
I think grief is the most difficult emotions for them to handle. It’s so big, full of love and emptiness.. they can’t deal with that at all..
Great advise! I stopped trying to fix them and allowed myself to fix me! The wait is long but I don’t give up that one day I’ll meet the right one!❤😊
I wish I had known this before I was married. You just described my husband perfectly. My husband has been emotionally unavailable our whole marriage(17 years). He tries, but he was raised by emotionally unavailable parents and he has no way of connecting to me. I have learned to live with it because I made a vow, “Till death do us part,” but it is lonely at times. We just went to dinner last night and try as I might to talk to him about things he just sat there and let every conversation die out. He then took out his phone and started looking at TikToks. He then said how his dad never took his mom out because he always wanted to be with his children, and he thought maybe he should do that too. He said that he missed the interactions of the children, and I can understand that, but it hurts that he cannot connect with me after all this time. He feels that after we talked about the highlights of the day we have discussed all there is to discuss, and we have no more to say to each other.😢
I was looking for his signs and i discovered mine..im the one who is unavaliable 🤯
Same! I’ve been working really hard on this. And the funny thing is, with every step you take and heal a bit, people around you change. Heck, even online content changes and responses on dating sites. It’s wild! Such a cool reflection though, seeing that you’re succeeding with your inner work and become whole and available. Wishing the same for you ❤ I’m sure you’ll get there, acknowledging this is a BIG step 💪🏻👍🏻
I thought I’m avoidant
So true and trying to fix or believing he has a good a heart or showing emphathy to his terrible childhood led me to be with a narcissist and my child suffer from that. I am finally out of the relationship but having spent 10 years in that every day you sometimes forget how valuable you are and either put walls up or end up with not narcissist this time but workaholic or emotionally unavailable guys. I find it hard to balance so I have been out of dating for years and find it difficult to get back to it really. These videos are encouraging.
Another sign of emotional unavailability is talking all the time but only about a certain topic (e.g. work). An emotionally unavailable person craves connection but is also deeply afraid of it so they’ll get it in very small bite sized chunks here and there, while also keeping the person at arm’s reach. Additionally when the emotionally available person pulls away, the emotionally unavailable person chases them because they care.
Tell me why this is exactly what I’m experiencing 🙃 😅 lmao
Truth 💯
There are a lot of videos about the other person being emotionally unavailable, but not many about when it’s actually yourself.
Matt you hit the nail on the head! I hope other women listen to this and make good decisions for themselves.
In my situation, I have noticed the disconnect and distance after the greatest moment.
The person as well would drift to talk about an unpleasant moment with ex which would change the energy of us getting closer.
After conversations and discussions of the pattern of these behaviors the person would seemingly trying to maintain focus, attention and self control for a few days then fall right back into the avoidance phase after a great moment 😳
Same here. After a particularly fun experience or date I wouldn’t hear from him for weeks.
@@annewrenn3496 This is not the right person for us… We want a man who is able to handle and manage these moments in a responsible caring, attentive way, not in an avoidance manner.
If the person is not emotionally available… the answer is clear… the individual is not ready to start a wholesome relationship.
We must create boundaries after we notice the pattern so we don’t get hurt or used in the process.
Thanks for sharing this. I appreciate you realizing this and making the necessary adjustments to not be used.❤️
@@debbielightmillercurtisaut9631thank you for sharing!
I couldn’t understand what I am currently experiencing. Now I don’t feel aIone. I have dated a guy for 5 months. He took it very slowly which I found pleasant eventually. He started to open after 4 months and we had such amazing full days and evenings together but the week after our last great date he was weird. It was like getting back one month backwards. He was distant and I finally found the courage to open the discussion. The result is, he doesn’t feel strong enough to commit to a new relationship while starting a new job. But telling me at the same time that I am the perfect person for him and that he likes me so much… Very confusing…
Anyway, you are right, we need to move on and focus on the men who can commit and have a healthy relationship.
Good luck and keep strong ❤
I married such a man, and into such a family. These people live in a fantasy world, and they push problems under the rug. If there is a problem, they blame on you for disrupting the fantasy…. I left my husband after 4 years of “feeling” alone in our marriage. Now’s he’s a changed man. AND I “divorced” my in-laws because they’re just as difficult to deal with. I’d rather be married to one narcissist than four.
Connecting became difficult especially when my mom died. I noticed that seeing me in constant pain and turmoil he didn’t seem affected by it seeing me like that or not even shed a tear when my mom was like a mom to him. I knew this man since childhood. It was weird to me…
Yep, the last guy that wanted to date me, I let him chase me for quite awhile and when I said yes, he backed out, and when I saw him at a place I go to that someone in my family passed he got up after a minute and walked away and didn’t stay there to support me.
I was in an occasion with my man, and a movie was been played that broke me down in tears. The movie took me down memory lanes of my loved ones i has lost. My man simply looked at me like I was creating an unnecessary scene, got up and went outside for some fresh air. When we got home and I talked about it, he kept changing the topic to something lighter😢
He’s got all the signs you talked about.
This vid right here is the kick I’ve been waiting for to walk away.
Unfortunately he ticks all my boxes.😭
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Checking if I’m emotionally unavailable too 😂
This was absolutely perfect! I noticed so much of this with the last person I invested in. He 💯 percent was emotionally unavailable. One thing I noticed, is anytime I gave him a gift that would possibly attach to a sentimental value(a zippo engraved for his bday) he would really pull back. I realized that I was pouring into him and I was getting nothing in return. I don’t even text him now.
You explain it well, and so does Elliott dating couch as he explains it . Emotionally unavailable.